Things to do when banned from Dot Net

[Ghost_of_Sierra57]

Anyone here? Hello? ..... hello .... hello ..... hello ..... echo ..... echo ..... echo .... echo ...... pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon .... Manny Mota!..... Mota ..... Mota ...... Mota .......

I got banned last night from Dot Net for referring to a certain group of people as The Trained Monkey Squad.  I started thinking about things to do while in exile.

So -

*I started talking to a woman I'd seen around the house. Turns out she's my wife!! Small world, eh?  Tonight we are going to play "Escaped Convict and Warden's Wife" - TWICE!  Tomorrow night - "Bill and Monica in the Oval Office".

* Showered and shaved - the dogs eyes aren't watering anymore.

* Break down and clean  M&P 15 AR, Rem 700 CDL and Browning Buckmark .22, which has to been done after 3 recent outings.

* Tune up electric fly swatter

* Stare at wall

* Sort through almost 120 lbs. of spent cartridges from my property and brothers property -ugh!

* Watch documentary on the mating habits of the Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka - absolute MUST SEE!!

* Split some firewood.

* Stare at wall some more

Ah, the life of an exile ........

[AAR]

Im not in exile but i do atare at walls often...im a loner IRL...

[Ghost_of_Sierra57]

I sometimes stare at my wife's boobs, too ........  I seemed to get slapped on the side of the head a lot after a few minutes of staring at them. Cause and effect? Pure coincidence?

[The War Wagon]

I sometimes stare at my wife's boobs, too ........  I seemed to get slapped on the side of the head a lot after a few minutes of staring at them. Cause and effect? Pure coincidence?

   

I prescribe 10,000 cc's of motorboating.   

[Ghost_of_Sierra57]

I sometimes stare at my wife's boobs, too ........  I seemed to get slapped on the side of the head a lot after a few minutes of staring at them. Cause and effect? Pure coincidence?

   

I prescribe 10,000 cc's of motorboating.   

I tried that and it was working, but I as I warmed to the task and got up around 3,000 RPMs, I slipped a disc in my neck.

I see you are from Pittsburgh.  That's where wifey is from.  She is one of da 'Burgh Sicilians. 

Btw, what the hell is up with words like  "Yinz", "Gumband", "Dahntahn", "Worsh", "Nebby", "Prolly", "Jaggerbush"  etc.? 

According to her, the name of the football team is "Picksburgh Stillers".  For real?

Can't yinz even speak proper English?

[The War Wagon]

I tried that and it was working, but I as I warmed to the task and got up around 3,000 RPMs, I slipped a disc in my neck.

Well if you're running a V-8, everyone KNOWS the sweetspot is 2,000 - 2,200rpms.  You just got carried away.   

I see you are from Pittsburgh.  That's where wifey is from.  She is one of da 'Burgh Sicilians.

My condolences.  Watch yer 6.   

Btw, what the hell is up with words like  "Yinz", "Gumband", "Dahntahn", "Worsh", "Nebby", "Prolly", "Jaggerbush"  etc.? 

According to her, the name of the football team is "Picksburgh Stillers".  For real?

Can't yinz even speak proper English?

I've been here 14 years now, and I still don't understand them.  I'm 10 generations from NC - I barely speak English. 

First 6 - 7 years I lived here, I giggled uncontrollably trying to say "Yinz."  I still tend to default to "y'all," but I can now say "yinz" with a straight face.

Did you see where Websters Dictionary officially accepted "Jagoff" the other day?  That's a Pittsburghism.  Never snows or gets icy out thataway, but ask your wife about, "slippy."  3 of my 4 kids were born here, and the oldest was 2 when we got here, so they all speak fluent Pittsburghese.  My accent is not quite "Hee Haw," but I don't come off as Jethro Bodean either.  Nonetheless, I laugh at them sometimes, because I see these little kids with my last name, and think of how DIFFERENT their childhood is from mine, and how their expressions sound NOTHING like what I grew up with in rural NC 40 years ago.